Monday, October 1, 2012

Match Making For Boomers: How To Make Him Fall In Love And ...

Is the guy you are falling in love with or crazy about not feeling the same way about you as you feel about him? Well, you and I know there is a method behind his madness but the key is unlocking the guard on his heart. What will help you is understanding what he needs to see and getting his head and heart moving in sync with yours.

First let's take a step back and clear one thing up. Regardless of how things turn out with Mr. Right, you will move forward with your life. You are divinely made and there is no one else like exactly like you in the entire universe. If for some strange reason your guy doesn't see the blessing you are to him, it's his loss. You must agree to not let his lack of vision negatively affect your life and future.

The reason why the above point is so important is because so many women get depressed when they find out that "The One" is really not "Mr. Right". While I will concede that broken love hurts, it shouldn't drag you into a mental pit that you can't climb out of. Trust me there is a special person out there for everyone. You don't give up on life or on men, because of one man's inability to see the treasure he has.

What I will be honest and upfront about is that I don't support two things when it comes to relationships and marriage.

1. I don't believe in any kind of trickery or magic or anything else that is not pure and natural.

2. I also don't believe rushing to the alter, in order to beat some biological clock that is ticking, makes any sense.

Regarding item number one, some women actually get a little desperate and use trickery to try to win a man's heart. I'm not talking about the spooky stuff like casting spells but rather getting a guy to commit under false pretenses.

For example, some women will try to change their personality and ways to be a better match for the man of their dreams. I don't have an issue with growing, maturing and evolving as a person. However, if it's a facade then at some point the old personality reappears and thus you have a mismatch. A mismatch equals problems, which leads to frustration, anger and a broken relationship. I don't want that for you.

As it relates to number two above, I believe rushing to get married can be risky. When we rush things we generally aren't as focused as we need to be and can easily miss stuff. I have found that it's better and less painful to take time to make sure he is the right one. Divorce is not painless and is time consuming. I want to see you get him to commit and the two of you live happily ever after.

So how do you get him to fall in love with you?

One of the keys to getting him to fall in love with you and wanting to commit is to give him what he needs and not what he wants. I hope I haven't confused you. You see, what I'm suggesting goes against your very nature.

For most of us, growing up we learned that if we wanted someone to like us, we kind of did what they wanted and give them what they wanted. In other words, our words and our actions screamed "please let me in to your special world". Fast forward to our adult relationships and it's the same. Instead now it's kind of like "I will be and do whatever you want and be who you want me to be if it means getting my dream partner for life".

So what's the problem with this way of thinking? Well, it's just the wrong way of going about it. If he can get everything he needs from you without being committed, why should he commit?

What you want to do is to give him a relationship now that fulfills he needs (not talking about the bedroom) and a glimpse of what the future will be like with you. What he wants to know is that his life will be complete with you by his side.

The other key thing you need to do to get him to fall in love with you and/or commit is to make sure you don't scare him away.

Remember I mentioned above about not rushing? What most men don't like is being pushed into a corner or feeling manipulated or pressured. In other words, most men want to feel as though they have reached the conclusion on their own that it's time to take it to the next level. If he feels pressured or manipulated, he may begin to distance himself from you and that's not what I want to see happen to you.

Summary:

It's very clear that I believe that you are special and uniquely made. I also, know how frustrating it can be when the person you have fallen in love with is not feeling the same way that you are. You can change that by being true to yourself and your guy. Give him want he needs, not what he wants and a taste of the future. Avoid making mistakes that so many women make and he will be yours forever and a day. If you need more guidance on this matter, please read more here, Get Him To Commit

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Source: http://matchmakingforbloomers.blogspot.com/2012/10/how-to-make-him-fall-in-love-and-want.html

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